In this article, I will discuss the role money has played in my life.
I will also share some perspective around how happiness works in relation to money.
Money is often thought of as a way to get happiness. People who want money often want it because they think it will make them happy.
I have a lot of experience with money because I have focused on it a great deal in my life.
As I grew up, I didn’t have a lot of money myself. I would get an allowance every week when I grew up.
Around the age of nine, my dad opened a bank account for me after I asked for that. We got the needed ID and the bank was able to open an account.
Before my Dad eventually passed away he would give me money here and there to save in my account. He passed about a year later. As a nine year old, I eventually saved about a hundred dollars. This was back in 2003 so maybe this was about $150 or more now.
The moment I saw a larger balance, I felt a sense of accomplishment and was happy with the progress I made. I was also happy that I could afford new video games for myself when they came out.
At Christmas I would get a combination of gifts and money. Not a huge amount of money, but a little bit here and there.
In Army Cadets, I got paid for the first time in my life. At the summer camps I attended from 2006-2009 as a course cadet we got training bonuses. Each cadet got about $10 per day so $60 per week. And as a 12 year old this was a real amount of money. I would end up spending it fast, but it was a nice thing to have.
In 2011, I got my first job as a 17 year old. I worked as a staff cadet Sergeant leading the courses that younger cadets would participate in. I worked for 7 weeks, and each day was paid. I made a few grand that summer and this was the first time ever I had way more money than I actually needed. I spent it well before the following summer, but I never forgot the feeling of having more than enough.
Abundance is the experience of having more than enough.
Scarcity is the feeling of having less than enough.
As I grew up, I wasn’t in a rich family. This means that I often asked for things that were hard for my family to afford. I didn’t experience their struggles with money as a kid, but it’s safe to say I didn’t grow up in abundance.
As I finished high school, I got a job but my mental health was not at all good. I had aspirations of becoming rich, even though I had no reference for the experience of being rich.
I had ambition, drive, and some degree of confidence.
I didn’t feel scarce or poor, but I was thinking about life as a millionaire.
My mental health in 2012-2013 was getting worse and worse. I had to quit my job and go into recovery mode. I was considered disabled and qualified for government disability.
In 2014, I was able to have time abundance because I had enough money to not have to work. And I actually really enjoyed this part of my life, but I would eventually want more from life. In 2014, I got about $1200 a month, and I was 20. I still lived at home, and didn’t have to work. I was able to afford most of what I wanted because what mattered to me were video games and hockey. I was still able to afford ball hockey.
This time in my life gave me a feeling of what passive income is like. I would have that money each month no matter what.
In 2015, I was put on a new medication for my mental health. It was at this point that I wanted to make changes in my life. I wanted to work and make more money.
I was no longer satisfied with a grand a month or so.
I knew I was employable, and it had been so long since I worked.
One of the side effects of this medication was gambling addiction. I would bring some of my money to the casino here and there. Sometimes I won, and sometimes I lost. But eventually a year later, I was going to the casino whenever I could. I had become a compulsive gambler. This addiction was right at the heart of my relationship towards money.
My long term ambitions of being a millionaire were mostly dreaming, I would think of ways that I could create a successful business.
When you win money in a casino, it creates a high because you made more in a one hour trip than you could possibly make any other way. Of course winning only creates a desire to win more. But the wins provided short term joy.
Over the last number of years, I was improving the employment I had.
Moving from part time landscaping to full time.
Then moving into the mental health field as a peer support worker. I’m at my happiest as a peer support worker because I’m doing work that is in my element. I make a meaningful contribution and get to do something that is good for my soul.
My job is more than a means to just survive.
About a year and a half ago, I got off that medication that was impacting my gambling addiction. When I stopped, this didn’t make the addiction magically go away. I sought out group therapy to understand my addiction better. I saw that I wasn’t alone in this addiction.
Eventually this year, I banned myself from online and real casinos.
Any loss is too much and no win is ever enough. The highs and lows of gambling addiction are not a good way to be happy with your finances.
I have stopped totally and it probably took a while for my pre-frontal cortex to heal from the addiction.
After a year and a half of serious work, I was liberated from the addiction. I feel like I did before the addiction started.
The relationship between money and happiness is personal.
I would say that progress is happiness.
If you want to be happy with your money, you’ll need to see progress. This means saving and investing.
When someone is bogged down by bills that are hard to afford, stress will be a problem.
When I was gambling, my finances were in chaos.
I was used to being poor as a kid and a young adult. I didn’t know that abundance is supposed to feel normal.
Abundance made me excited after a win, but until it became a standard for me to be good with money, I never was.
Being smart with money will result in more, and you’ll see steady progress.
Making decisions to live with less bills, and only having a minimal amount of bills will make money a far less stressful thing in your life.
Some law of attraction authors advocate for spending like crazy to feel rich. They think that feeling rich is what leads to being rich.
In reality your feelings mean less than your actions. So don’t tip at a level that’s uncomfortable. Spend less in categories that don’t return happiness.
Invest in experiences and not things.
The vast majority of wealthy people are frugal, and they are happy because they have peace of mind around their money.
A net worth won’t make you happy, but knowing you have way more than you need is going to allow for a great deal of peace. Stress will be much lower.
So money is not a direct factor in happiness, but having it handled allows you to enjoy greater things in life.
To your success,
Angus